Note: The full-length version of the play Leaves was performed in September 2023 by members of the York Settlement Community Players as part of their Direct Approach Project at the Black Swan in York.
CHARACTERS
Ellen /Allan -late 30s, jaded, capable, sarcastic
Joe /Jo -early 20s, enthusiastic, loves poetry
Bryony /Bryan -30s/40s, caring, talented, optimistic
Martin /Martina -50s/60s, bureaucratic, frustrated
Voice of Computer, extremely perky
In this version, Ellen and Bryony are female, Joe and Martin are male with a gender-neutral computer. However, all characters are written to be gender-swapped if required.
SCENE ONE
A lab in a space station. There are two desks with a chair at each. At the back of the room is a shelf with a toolbox on. Ellen’s desk is at the front of the stage, she’s seated at it and working on an autumnal-coloured leaf with a paintbrush.
Voice of Computer: It is 9:30 Sol Time on August 19th P.E. Anno 18. Terra 2’s weather is warm with a temperature of 19 degrees Celsius. Showers unlikely. Have a great day!
E: Shut up, computer!
Enter Bryony.
B: Daffodils! Little yellow… buggers!
E: They getting you down?
B: Who knew they were so tricky? Wow, it’s hot.
E: Hotter than 19 degrees. This computer is driving me nuts.
B: I thought there was something weird.
E: There is. I’m waiting for Joe to come and sort it.
B: Can’t we up the air-con?
E: Martin says budget cuts. We’re using too much power. And it is summer after all.
B: I see. Commence sucking it up. I need some more yellow pigments. Will catch you later, Ellen.
E: See you Bryony, stay cool out there!
Bryony gives the peace sign and exits. Ellen lifts high the leaf she’s been working on and drops it onto the table.
Voice of Computer: It is 9:35 Sol Time on August 19th P.E. Anno 18. Terra 2’s weather is warm with a temperature of 18.5 degrees Celsius. Congratulations to the Radley family who’ve just had triplets. All in the Northern Hemisphere biome wish you the very best. Have a great summer!
E: Joe!!!
Joe enters sticking his head around the door.
J: Yeah?
E: Can you fix this bloody, blasted thing?
J: Of course, sorry, I was just getting you some coffee. Or it is too hot for coffee?
E: Nearly too hot. But not quite.
Joe grins and enters with two cups.
J: I got it from the coffee cart in Park 204, west quadrant. My sister’s working on it now. You know they’ve finally got coffee beans growing in the soil here? And coconuts too, weirdly…. You want me to fix the thing, don’t you?
Ellen nods. Joe drops the cups on the table and then climbs underneath it, awkwardly.
J: They’re going off every five minutes, aren’t they? Sorry, I think I know what to do…
Voice of Computer: C’est neuf heurs moins vight. Le temps du soliel. Aout Dix neuf…
J: Sorry!
Joe tries to get up and bonks his head on the desk.
Voice of Computer: El clima de Terra 2 es caliente con una temperatura de diecinueve grados centígrados. Lluvias improbables. Buonas dias!
J: Just cycling through the settings…. There!
Joe stands up, Ellen looks unimpressed. Joe takes a sip of his coffee.
J: How’s the leaf?
Ellen picks it up and drops it on the table.
J: Oh my god!
E: I think I did it.
She grins.
J: OH MY GOD!!!
E: Well, I nearly did it.
J: It’s beautiful.
E: It’s not quite there.
J: Ellen – this is amazing!
He hugs her then jumps back, uncomfortably.
E: Thank you – I think I need another crack at it…
J: I love it! The colours! It’s gorgeous! Makes me want to jump up and down.
E: Go ahead.
Joe backs off then jumps up and down on the spot with excitement. Ellen smiles.
E: Thanks for that – but the texture isn’t quite right…
Joe stops and approaches the desk.
J: Can I touch it? Does it work?
E: It should work.
Joe picks up the leaf.
J: I’m not going to break it?
Ellen shakes her head. Joe drops the leaf from a height.
J: WOW!!!
He picks it up.
J: So, in autumn, did trees have like … ten of these?
E: A few more than that. You must have seen pictures?
J: Yes, but I never figured out how it worked. The idea that the leaves just …. Disappeared in winter. Didn’t people complain?
E: Surprisingly, no. People did love to complain on Earth, but not about that.
J: I wish I could’ve seen it.
E: Well, there’s plenty of virtual reality simulators….
J: I can’t afford those! And everyone says it’s not the same anyway.
E: No, it’s not.
J: I found a poem in my book for you. (He retrieves a battered book from his pocket) Isn’t it cool? It’s soooooo old. It was my grandma’s. Listen. It’s called “Ode to Autumn” –
E: Oh god, it’s like being back at school!
J: It’s about leaves! And other stuff! Would you mind if I read it to you? It’s really amazing-
Enter Martin
E: Martin!
J: (Hiding the book) Oh, hi, boss.
M: Ellen. (He nods.) How’s the leaf coming on?
J: She did it! It does the thing! Look, it does the thing!
He lifts the leaf, and it falls to the desk.
M: Let me see that. Joe, don’t you have some CO2 tanks to empty?
J: Yes, but … sorry. It’s just I’ve read all about these ….
Martin pushes Joe out of the way to investigate the leaf.
M: Texture’s not right.
E: I know.
M: Needs to be crispy.
E: Crunchy.
J: Did people used to eat them?
M: The settlers won’t accept anything less than perfect. It has to be just as they remember it. Do it again.
E: I will.
M: Joe, we’ll need to turn up the gravity levels in September to make these actually fall. Can you schedule that?
Joe nods.
M: Good. Less than two weeks, Ellen. Need more progress, the reputation of the Vivaldi lab does depend on it.
E: Yes, Martin, I’m on it.
Martin exits.
Ellen looks crestfallen.
E: Better get on those tanks, Joe.
Joe starts to leave.
J: I really love the leaf.
E: Thank you.
Joe stands around trying to say something.
E: People will literally asphyxiate in their beds, Joe.
J: Sorry!
Joe exits. Ellen picks up the leaf a few times and prods it.
E: Bollocks.
Martin re-enters. Ellen jumps.
M: We’ve got a serious problem here, Ellen.
E: We’ll make it work.
M: We’ve got this brand-new residential quadrant and it’s not ready. People are spending serious money to live here in the New British Zone and we’re the only team not pulling their weight. The seniors aren’t happy, Ellen.
Martin is pacing, Ellen stands to face him.
E: We don’t have enough staff. Or resources. Not enough organic material.
M: We can’t grow enough organic material on this planet, you know that. Not just for the leaves. They need to be synthetic – Jesus, how many times, do I need to explain?
E: You can explain but you can’t make –
M: You remember what happened to the snow team?
Pause.
E: I’d rather forget.
M: So would I. Your sister was a talented artist. But she damaged us. We must deliver this time.
E: I don’t want to talk about Nicky.
M: The whole snow team were a liability! I’m not going to start being a mineral miner, not at my age. Eighteen bloody years on this planet. God, it’s hot in here. (He wipes his face.) All this fuss about autumn. I always hated autumn. Too bloody cold. Miserable weather. You’d have thought this lovely balmy heat would agree with people. Wasn’t it what we all liked? Trips to the seaside, beer gardens, summer holidays.
E: In some countries, Martin, in some countries.
M: Ice creams, fish and chips.
E: Droughts, famine, scorched earth. Those last years on earth?
M: It doesn’t pay to dredge up those days, it was hard for everyone. That’s why we left.
E: Some of us.
M: Lucky ones, yes I know. I count myself lucky. But here we now and we can’t dwell on that dried out old husk. We have a fresh start.
E: Except people want it to be exactly the same.
M: Like I said- these are the wealthiest settlers that we’re catering for –
E: Seasons, daytime, nighttime, weather….
M: Paying us to develop something truly unique….
E: A 24-hour day on a planet with 11 moons and virtually no rotation. No natural light, no natural dark.
M: We’re providing a home from home.
E: Wanting a 365-day year, with everything just as they liked it.
M: It’s supposed to a creative challenge. You’re just working too slowly.
E: We spend most of our energy trying to convert the toxic gases out there into oxygen – it’s a miracle we’re even able to breathe.
M: You’re getting upset again.
Pause.
M: Remember what a triumph the May blossoms were. What a proud day that was. We need results, Ellen. Good results.
E: Or we’ll “end up like the snow team.”
M: I’d rather not make threats. Just get it working….
Martin exits.
Natalie started creating theatre as a child in her grandma’s bungalow in Hull. Her play Leaves was written and performed in 2023 and she co-wrote and directed the award-winning webseries Tales of Bacon. She has a Creative Writing MFA from York St John University and is the Chair of the York Settlement Community Players.
Terra Two 